So, here we are. The beginning of another fandamtastic new year. 2008 sucked like an industrial Hoover and I'd like to say that 2009 can only get better but seriously, I don't want to tempt fate like that...you know, just in case fate is sitting around still trying to work off a really bad left over New Year's Eve hangover and suddenly remembers that I'm uncoordinated and she just happens to have a spare banana peel laying around...yeah, don't want to go there.
Alright, so most people approach the beginning of a new year as though they've been handed a clean slate. THIS is the year I'm finally going to: write the great American novel, lose weight, exercise more, be kinder to people, be kinder to myself, quit smoking, quit cussing, quit my job, go back to school, stop watching so much tv, etc.
It's a nice idea, really, but let's face it, the calendar doesn't have anything to do with any of those things. The switching of the 2008 calendar to the 2009 calendar doesn't suddenly give any of us a miracle personality makeover. I was fundamentally lazy on Dec. 31, 2008 and I don't expect that on Jan. 1, 2009, I'm suddenly going to become a ball of energy and be able to exercise my fat arse into shape. I'm cranky, irritable and mostly annoyed by people and don't expect that the flip of a calendar page is going to turn me into a freaking Pollyanna.
So, with all that in mind, I am making resolutions that are more in keeping with the 'me' that I know I am and therefore are resolutions that I am likely to keep (setting yourself up for success is very good for the self-esteem!) :
1. I vow to try not to cuss out little old ladies when they're driving in front of me at 5 mph with their blinkers on for 10 blocks (at least not with the windows rolled down).
2. I vow to actually pry my lazy arse off the sofa once or twice an evening and going to the kitchen for a snack doesn't count (going to the bathroom though...well, that's all the way down the hall so I think that totally counts).
Uh, yeah, that's about it. See, totally do-able!