It's a Conspiracy!!

Mood: Frustrated (writing is not going really well today. On the other hand, I've gotten a hell of a lot of work done around the house.)

What I'm Watching: Roseanne (The torando episode. It's a testament to how tired I am of cold and snow that I'm actually wishing we had the warm spring weather that would bring with it thunderstorms and tornado warnings).

I would just like to say that I'm not much of a conspiracy theorist. I'm not trying to say that the moon landing was filmed on a Hollywood sound stage or that the government is studying alien life forms in Area 54. However, there is one conspiracy in my life that is so big, so annoying and so unavoidable that it must be addressed. I'm talking, of course, about the snow plow drivers.

I'm appreciative of the invaluable services that they offer and for years I assumed that it was an unfortunate coincidence that the snow plow would always go by and shove a large pile of snow at the end of my drive just as I'd finished shoveling it out (by hand no less). I tried to be understanding when they would shove piles of snow into the drive of the church where I work making it nearly impossible for me to make my way into the parking area. I've even been patient when they've plowed piles of snow behind my car in our apartment parking lot (they plow in the middle of the night...and just make a pass behind the cars).

What I cannot understand is why every single snow plow driver we've ever had clear the parking lot at the church where I work will invariably pile the snow they plow right up against the sign at the corner of our property. This is the sign that I have to change every week. By hand. The church parking lot is HUGE and there are literally hundreds of other places the snow could be piled, but no. They always pile it right where I have to hike through to change that stupid sign. Schlepping through snow up to my knees in dress shoes and dress slacks is definitely not my idea of a good time.

At first I thought it was just one thoughtless driver. When another driver did the same thing the next year, I thought it was a coincidence. Now? We've got yet another driver doing the same thing. Obviously at some point in my life I've done something to seriously piss off the snow plow drivers of the world and now they're all gunning for me!

So, I'd just like all my friends to know that if I go missing before spring, please check the 6ft pile of snow next to the church sign.

It's Not Time to Panic Yet!

Mood: Irritated (Seriously, I had a great blog post all written and my computer flaked and now? It's gone)

What I'm Watching: King of the Hill (I tell you what!)

For those of you who don't know, I live in central Illinois. It's a place where ice, snow and freezing temperatures are as common in the winter as corn, soybeans and road construction are in the summer. Currently we're under a winter weather warning calling for 7 - 12" of snow, high winds and sub zero temps. Honestly? I'm totally aware of the complete suckage factor involved here. Shoveling snow, slipping on the ice and scraping my car windows are definitely NOT a few of my favorite things. However, having lived here my entire life, I've come to accept them as inevitable like death, taxes and bad tv talk shows (Maury, I'm totally looking at you here).

So, I have to admit complete confusion when other people treat any forecast for more than a dusting of snow as a cause for complete panic. People? We live in an area where this weather is not unusual. We have snow plows and salt trucks to handle the situation. There is no need to rush out in a blind panic to strip the stores of every last bit of milk, bread and toilet paper. It's a snowstorm, not the end of the freaking world.

Also, if you're out driving in the sucky snowy weather, please drive carefully. You may think you can drive 70 mph in this weather but let me assure you, you can't. While I don't necessarily care if you run your idiot self into the ditch (and you will), I'm going to be incredibly ticked if you take me along with you. Seriously. Ticked.

And, for those of you who don't live in an area blessed with the kind of snow we can get here, I've thoughtfully provided pictures from last winter for your snowy enjoyment.

This is the window of our old aparment that has snow drifted halfway up it. We got a few more inches after this picture was taken but it gives you an idea.

This is a picture of an ice storm we had last January. Can't really tell from this pic but there's about two inches of solid ice covering everything. Still? We managed to get out and about so still no need to panic folks!