15 October 2009

The Angst of Being a Writer

Mood: Inspired (Work in Progess is back in progress...YAY!)

What I'm Listening To: Don't Stop Believing (Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world...)

Current Word Count: 9,594 (Don't be too impressed, I just decided the the words that I cut a copule of weeks ago actually work much better than I thought they did so I put them back. Sigh. Have realized I'm the Brett Favre of the writing world.)

People always seem surprised when they find out I'm working on a book. Truthfully, the explanation for their surprise is fairly simple...I don't talk too much about my writing in my real , day to day life. Why? It's not like I've got a side job as a stripper or a drug mule or anything but when someone asks me about my writing I suddenly feel as though the Pastor has busted me coming out of the back room at the local video store.

Having given a lot of thought to my reaction, I've come to the following conclusions:

1.) Talking about my writing would mean that I'd actually have to, you know, write...something. Anything. And? Sometimes (most of the time) I'm a lazy, unmotivated writer.

2.) Like most artists, I secretly fear that I suck at what I do...and no one wants to admit that they've written or are in the process of writing a book which has the suckage factor of, say, "Eyes Wide Shut".

3.) To most people in my world (i.e: My family) saying "I'm writing a book" is on par with saying "I'm going to be a movie star" or "I'm going to be President of the United States". The supportive, follow your dreams crap? We're not so good with that.

However, I'm working on coming out of the writer's closet and declaring myself a sometimes lazy, sometimes unmotivated dreamer who spins sometimes silly stories and who dreams of someday having them completed and published.

And if that doesn't work out? The dream of being a Wal-Mart door greeter lives on!

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2 comments:

  1. I know exactly what you're talking about. Although I do talk about my writing with my parents and my boyfriend (who are incredibly supportive), my extended family aren't so rawraw. Then again, they don't even support me going to university...

    Anyway, I think to gain more confidence in your writing (and therefore yourself) you need to be open about it. Damn their opinions and their snide remarks and embrace your crazy, eccentric self-- as writers, we all have them. Your family may suck the big one when it comes to support, but at least you got me backin' ya up now =D Dunno if that's a bonus or not, LOL!

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  2. Hey, I've given you an award on my blog =]

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